There is a lot to be said about a person by the way they cut grass.

I had never given too much thought to it before last night, when somebody at a party made a comment about the two types of people in the world: 

1) The ones who cut their grass in straight lines, to-ing and fro-ing. Walking back and forth, and back and forth. And back. And forth. 

2) The ones who cut the perimeter first. Circling like mechanical vultures with no real prey in sight. Or like Pac-men with razor sharp teeth; the patch of unwittingly resilient grass in the center of the yard growing smaller all the while. Like the green eye of a dying hurricane.

But really.

There are a million ways to cut your grass.

And there is nothing important to be learned by studying any of them.

Just cut your fucking grass.